Asswipe party

See these people? See how happy they are? They’re down on their knees, clutching their hands together in prayer, waving their mass-produced, church-funded banners! They’re ecstatic with religious fervour! They’ve won their apocalyptic battle! They’ve beaten off the evil perverted hordes! Every thread of synthetic fibre on their overfed bodies is twisting in virginal delight at the victory of natural law! Look at the fat one in the middle! She’s creaming her impeccable jeans! There’s no way she’s going to let other tax-payers get their hands on her tubby little rights, or children (Because that’s what they want! They want our kids!)! Look at the priestly one on the left with his neat sticker and his would-be workman’s overalls, whose hand’s all scratched up by the entirely natural bifocals of the old bat on the floor! (Because God made bifocals! God made comfort wear!) He’s the one who passed the collection plate during mass to stop those sick faggots having the right to hospital visits! Hallelujah! Look at the skinny one with the skinhead haircut, who’s sublimated his filthy desires and has never, no never, had sex with a man! Oh joy! Oh fucking joy! Oh fucking fucking joy!


Yes, I’m annoyed, too annoyed for subtlety or wit, by the results of the Maine referendum on marriage equality. I don’t live in Maine, and have never considered doing so. And the presence of these asswipes (thank you, Wendell), celebrating the success of a referendum that cancels the rights of a substantial minority of tax-payers, without any reduction in the taxes they pay, is unlikely to make me change my mind. Everything that needs to be said about the kind of god these people worship has already been said (by, among others, Xenophanes*), so I won’t repeat it, but it is worth repeating that the moral high ground in this issue isn’t where they’re holding their squalid little party. It’s somewhere else, somewhere very far away from where they’re gathered, somewhere they’ll never, in their wildest dreams, be able to reach. And it’s a far better place.

*if cattle or horses or lions had hands and could draw,

And could sculpt like men, then the horses would draw their gods
Like horses, and cattle like cattle; and each they would shape
Bodies of gods in the likeness, each kind, of their own

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6 Responses to Asswipe party

  1. Rob Spence says:

    The kid just looks bemused. I think Mom took him because she's worried about him…

  2. Yes, well, she could be right.I'm a little calmer about the issue this morning, Rob (and sober!). Still, overblown rhetoric has its place…

  3. nmj says:

    Charles, I am quoting a friend of a friend on Facebook: Dear Maine, You can suck it.

  4. It would do them, and everyone else, a lot of good if they did, nmj.

  5. nmj says:

    …i think your post is brilliant, and i have just linked to it on FB…

  6. Kavi says:

    That's funny, the first thing I noticed in that photo was how the skinheaded guy doesn't seem to be actually celebrating. Better show a little spirit there, closet case!

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